Just Keep My Martini Cool
On tour with the Penn and Teller of Bond authors… and the girl who kept shouting “Octopussy!”
In 2002, John Cork and Bruce Scivally were on a multi-city James Bond: The Legacy promotion tour, when I got the call to help out with the Washington, DC leg of their junket. Thursday started with a book signing at the International Spy Museum, and then culminated that evening with a 007 Trivia Challenge at Felix, the spy-themed Martini bar in Adams Morgan that is named for Felix Leiter.
Along with John and Bruce, the Finlandia girls were there to help give out free sample Martinis with Bond’s new choice in vodka. Alas they were not giving any foot massages that are so popular in their native Finland. At 9:30 the Bond trivia contest began, with John emceeing and Bruce handing out the prizes, which included Die Another Day playing cards, posters, toys, Finlandia merchandise, Norelco merchandise, MGM DVD sets, Penguin Fleming paperbacks, soundtracks, and more.
One thing you quickly realize at events like these is that while Bond fans might know how many seconds are left on the atomic bomb before it irradiates Ft. Knox, to the average bar goer – James Bond films are fun, but the details (“Who is M’s Secretary?” and “What color is Ursula Andress’s bikini in Dr. No?”) are a little bit fuzzy.
Not wanting to be seen as a ringer in the crowd, I instead chose to selflessly help out attractive young women whose disappointment turned to glee as I helped them win prizes. I can’t say that I often have the chance to whisper “Thunderball” in the ear of a beautiful stranger.
Another thing you realize is that often people know a single Bond film or title, and they are convinced that it is the answer for almost any question. By far the most amusing instance of this phenomenon was the girl at the bar who, no matter what the question, kept shouting “Octopussy!” at the top of her lungs as her answer.
After all the prizes were awarded I got some time to speak with the Finlandia marketing rep that helped coordinate the event. I asked him if Finlandia employees were excited to be associated with Bond. He told me that the Finlandia distributors were all at a conference in Charleston when an assistant interrupted the proceedings to let them all know that they had landed the Bond sponsorship, and the conference immediately erupted into applause and cheers. So, yes, they are excited.
John told me that all the Bond promotional partners have been enthusiastic and easy to deal with. So these events have served many purposes: to help promote awareness of Die Another Day, to promote awareness of the James Bond: The Legacy book, to promote the promotional partner’s merchandise, and finally to remind people of just how cool James Bond is. You didn’t see Vin Diesel or the xXx gang handing out free goodies now did you?
The next morning we were back at the International Spy Museum for more book signings. An early morning radio interview had helped bring out a good crowd, and the staff at the museum told me it has been their most successful book signing to date. By mid-afternoon John and Bruce went to a second radio interview, which gave me some time to have lunch with my girlfriend and take the Spy Museum tour. It is a fantastic museum, with 3 floors of exhibits, including a replica 007 Aston Martin DB5, and Bond and Fleming references peppered throughout. The gift shop is a Bond fan’s dream, with 007 books, DVDs, toys, shot glasses, clothing and more tempting you to add to your collection.
John and Bruce returned for a final hour of signing that stretched into a second hour. While John was shopping in the museum store I got to spend a little more time with Bruce, who I had met only briefly while helping out with the On Her Majesty’s Secret Service DVD a few years ago. He told me that he and John joked about being the Penn and Teller of Bond authors, since John is outgoing and energetic and does most of the talking, while Bruce is quiet and unassuming. But don’t let that exterior fool you. His wit is rapier sharp, and his research, organization, and knowledge meld with John’s to form an outstanding Bond team.
As we were getting ready to go, one last couple came up with a question about Lazenby and On Her Majesty’s Secret Service. Bruce said “Well we have the Lazenby/OHMSS expert right here” and let me answer their question, while mentioning that I own Rigg’s wedding gown from the film. Bruce had them laughing when he said, “He only wears it on special occasions.”
We packed up, and said our goodbyes. John would soon be off to England, Bruce back to L.A., and me back to Maryland. I hope that future stops on the tour are just as successful, and I had a blast as their point man in DC. Now I just have to track down the girl who kept shouting, “Octopussy!”
